Every Girl's A Little Big Gay For Adele

I just want to jump firmly on the 'OMFG ADELE IS THE BEST THING TO HAPPEN TO POP MUSIC EVER' bandwagon which has been growing in speed since her performance of 'Someone Like You' on Jools Holland in January. One amazing voice and a piano had almost everyone I know in tears and deleting their ex's facebook friendship/mobile number before they did something silly.


I have been listening to 21 on repeat for about three weeks now. I have been watching videos of her on YouTube religiously. I have ranged from finger-snapping 'you-go-girl' outrage at her ex-boyfriend, to weeping inconsolably because, let's face it, if the feisty Cockney singer can have her heart-broken, we're all doomed. As far as I'm concerned, she is not only single-handedly rescuing popular music from the mind-numbing synths and dance-beats filling the Top 40; she is also one of the best female role models to have been overwhelmingly lauded by the public in quite some time. My girl friends love her; my straight male friends fancy her; my gay male friends want to be her best friend. Everything about her is beautiful and real; her sultry voice, which is without fail even better live than recorded; her figure, which is so perfectly womanly; and her shining personality, where she can have an audience in stitches seconds after breaking their hearts with Turning Tables. If Adele has ever been asked to lose weight, I can only assume she belted Chasing Pavements in her accuser's face and they scurried off to a corner to curl up with only their tepid mediocrity to keep them warm at night.


A few months ago, she was the cover girl for Glamour. In her interview, she thanked the editor, Jo Elvin, for being brave enough to put a bigger girl on the cover of Britain's biggest-selling female magazine. What a sad pass to have come to, that such an undeniably talented woman who got where she is through her own entirely natural merits, should have to feel gratitude for being not only accepted as she is, but for being celebrated for it too. Adele does not conform to the media's ideal of a perfect figure, and neither is she attempting to lead a revolution against it. Instead, she is who she is, and we should all follow her example by being happy in ourselves. She is the most prevalent example today that beauty does not have to be skinny; it has to be genuine.


So, next time I catch myself envying a slender figure that I will never naturally attain, I'm going to sing Rolling in the Deep at the top of my lungs. And to anyone who ever tries to make me feel bad: 'you're gonna wish you never had met me.'